Don’t be afraid; let’s get NAKED!

14 Feb

It’s no surprise that this title came to me whilst I was in the shower. (It isn’t what you think! Ok, maybe a little bit.)
So it got me thinking, (obviously I’m out the shower at this point) that we all need to get NAKED! Now before you all get excited and stuff, this isn’t “50 shades – The Remix”. When I talk about nakedness I’m referring primarily to stripping down your layers of protection, opening up and being vulnerable.

It’s interesting that nowadays physical nakedness is associated with something unnatural, shameful and inappropriate. Before, nakedness reflected purity; it represented a state of perfection. Nobody wants to be bare anymore. People feel the need to cover up and hide behind things like make-up, designer clothes, job titles/status and money as if these things define them and validate their being. But I think it’s time for us to get naked, not just physically (yea some of you will love that) but also emotionally. Be honest with ourselves and be honest with others.

Now I can’t speak for you all, but for a long time I wasn’t being honest about who I was or what I wanted. And after spending time thinking why this was, I concluded it was because I was afraid of rejection; rejection through revealing my feelings, frustrations, fears and failures. I felt inferior, not necessarily in comparison to others, but like I just wasn’t or wouldn’t be good enough because of all my flaws. This was the manifestation of my fear of abandonment from different events in my life. So I’d put on different masks to appear stronger and keep people at a distance. But the ‘emotionally-centred’ me started cracking through. Now I appreciate my weaknesses are no accident; they add to the authenticity of my individuality.


I saw this quote somewhere, “Don’t tell anyone your problems because 80% don’t care and 20% are glad you have them.” And it made me suspicious to the logic behind it. In this selfish society, are people really too busy dealing with their own “problems” to be concerned with the affairs of another? If so, it’s no surprise people look for darker sunglasses and continue to freeze the icebox where their hearts used to be causing people to abstain from meaningful social intercourse. How can you experience the highest pleasure in relationships if you have to question everyone’s motives?

Believe it or not, but vulnerability is emotionally liberating. We all know nobody is perfect and everyone has their weaknesses. So why some go to great lengths to conceal these truths (or even deny such) is beyond me (literally, I’m tired of hiding how I really feel). Maybe some are afraid of opening their lives to others because they think people won’t like the real, broken, insecure person we are (how ironic). Unless you exist outside of time, distance and space, you are not really ‘self-sufficient’; we all need somebody to lean on (cue Bill Withers). Or maybe you had a lot of crooks try to steal your heart and you don’t know how to get your emotions involved or how to surrender your heart. Either way, it takes great courage to be truly vulnerable.

We don’t have to be strong every day.
Tears do not indicate weakness.
Emotions are not attributes of unstable people.
Pride is a sign of emotional immaturity.
Loving first and most is strength of the fearless.

What do you gain from building up walls? Sure maybe you won’t get hurt, disappointed or bamboozled but your relationships will always lack that intimacy that is established through sharing your struggles and being bare (I’m talking about platonic relationships as well).


The world has become so superficial but I promise you, there is someone out there who is super special and sees your vulnerability as a reason to truly care.

Let down your walls.

Ms Tola xx


8 Responses to “Don’t be afraid; let’s get NAKED!”

  1. fatai lawal February 16, 2013 at 11:17 am #

    those who know need no explanation. those who did not need non explanation. it is beyond intelligence.


  2. thoughtchannel February 16, 2013 at 2:00 pm #

    Thank you very much Mr Lawal xx


  3. Liz Dore February 19, 2013 at 3:08 am #

    Thanks for Let’s get Naked. Very insightful and refreshing. It’s so important to be comfortable in your own skin yet accepting of imperfections and vulnerabilities. Regarding the quote “Don’t tell anyone your problems because 80% don’t care and 20% are glad you have them.” My experience is different, as I have had people support me when I’ve had problems. I’ve been leant money when I really needed it, supported when I’ve lost a family member, been offered a bedroom when I quickly had to move out and given a truly listening ear and empathetic heart when I needed it most. Liz Dore


    • thoughtchannel February 19, 2013 at 1:21 pm #

      Hi Liz. Glad you enjoyed this post and I appreciate your comment. I’m glad you’ve have a great experience in regards to support systems, because that is honestly how it should be. We should all be comfortable, and accept who we are because THAT is what makes us special.
      Thanks again for stopping by.
      Tola x


  4. joanne morton February 26, 2013 at 12:59 am #

    I’m researching a Ted Talk video I’m facilitating on Thursday – Love & Vulnerability – saw your post on Brene Brown’s video (we’re showing this one ! ) and clicked over to your post! Learning a lot about vulnerability and myself … finding that there really is a place for all of us to express our hearts openly. When we do, I feel such a feeling of connectiveness … community …not alone …. and isn’t that what vulnerability is – a disconnect from LOVE. Should be an interesting evening discussion! Keep sharing your Magic Passion Love – the world needs it and is very grateful xo joanne


    • thoughtchannel February 26, 2013 at 1:33 pm #

      Hi Joanne,
      Thank you for your inspiring words. There is a place for us to be open, and we shouldn’t shy away from it, especially if it the gateway for healing to come through.
      Hope your discussion video goes well.



  1. Quarter-Life Crisis | thoughtchannel - April 17, 2013

    […] to be honest with yourself, because living a lie only leads you to where you don’t want to be. You have to get naked! Be attentive to the sounds of your […]


  2. Quarter-Life Crisis | thoughtchannel - April 21, 2013

    […] to be honest with yourself, because living a lie only leads you to where you don’t want to be. You have to get naked! Be attentive to the sounds of your inner […]


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